I think i’m starting to have anxiety issues…
There are very few people in this world I respect. Lots of the people i know seem to be selfish with no consideration for others. I hate seeing people I care about hurt and feeling powerless to do anything about it cause even when i try to create change nothing happens.
I hate always being there for people and feeling like i’m still not good enough for them. I hate this lie people tell themselves that people need to prove themselves to be worth their time.
I hate that i have to recognize my own faults and apologize for them and others can’t do the same.
Is my best really not good enough for some people? I thought people wanted someone that they can laugh with and who cares about them and apologizes for their mistakes. What more can i give?
I’m tired of seeing bad things happen to good people and seeing good things happen to bad people.
I’m tired of hiding behind my optimism that people can be better than they are when they ALWAYS prove me wrong.
I need a break…I need to surround myself with the good people in my life and help them and let go of everything else. I’m tired of wasting my time on people who don’t value me or prove to me i’m not good enough for them.
All this and I can’t escape the anxious feeling in my chest. I have so much i have to deal with and it just feels like too much.